Companies have been outdoing each other of late when it comes to creative job naming. Check out our selection of the craziest job titles.
It’s said that September is the new January, so right now you might be seeking a different job. And if you want a change away from a dull desk, how about skating onto the startup scene?
Just be careful that you’re not shocked by the names of some of the job positions out there...
1. Virtual Assistant
...is a tame way to start our list; it’s definitely no longer a phrase you’d only find in sci-fi pulp fiction. And especially in connection with the corona crisis, where a large part of work has shifted to work-from-home, there’s a huge demand for remote workers. And this applies for day-to-day overhead as well.
Virtual assistants are basically ordinary office positions that work remotely. They arrange meetings for you, prepare invoicing documents, plan company events, and more. There’s a whole Facebook community for Czechoslovak virtual assistants alone!
2. Monkey Tamer at the Center for Potato People
And here things start to get weird. Because this job title (a real one at the Czech StartupJobs portal) doesn’t give even the faintest clue of what the job actually involves. Is it work at a zoo? At an amusement park? Or is it a frilly name related to a potato-growers’ club? Not at all.
Monkey Tamer is the hiring company’s joke-name for a traditional account manager, and the Center for Potato People alludes to the cult-hit series Red Dwarf. If you find their ad funny, and you can wrangle Czech monkeys, feel free to sign up!
3. Director of First Impressions
This creative job title basically copies the duties of what receptionists usually do at corporations. In short: Welcome visitors in, take care of them with a smile, offer them coffee, and just overall: create a good first impression.
And that is, after all, a huge responsibility, so why doesn’t someone like this deserve a role in top management? And the pay looks good too!
4. CPO – Chief Play Officer
This is one for when you’ve got a toy manufacturing company and you don’t want to undervalue UX! Toys R Us definitely knows its way around the thin ice of child labor. Because every year, they hire a child specialist whose main task is to play. That is, to do what’s most natural for children—and what’s most important for this toy giant.
This is precisely how they test and set which of their prototypes will end up as a toy on their stores’ shelves. So it’s no wonder their child experts are paid well for playing hard!
5. Paranoid in Chief
Yahoo was the first to come up with this job title, and it denotes none other than the head of IT security. That is, the person who has to be constantly paranoid so that no corporate information concerning health records, financial flows, or intellectual property leaks out of the company. In short, in a global digital economy with continually evolving threats, a little paranoia is definitely in order.
And in that situation, it’s good for someone to be in charge of it.
6. Marketing Ninja
E-mail ninja, social media ninja, PHP ninja… Nope, these aren’t modern versions of Japanese spy units. But just like ninjas, they are real killers in their areas.
Ninjas in marketing and tech fields already abound on the startup scene, but companies’ thirst for them has not yet been quenched. So it may pay to invest in your own training in this area. It seems the future belongs to ninjas!
7. Commissioner of Happiness
Job portals are overflowing with a variety of happiness managers, but imagine being a happiness manager for an entire country! Seriously. In this electoral period, the Nigerian government has approved the creation of a new ministry in their country—the Ministry of Happiness and Purpose Fulfillment—and will be the very first of its kind in the world. Their first Commissioner of Happiness has already stepped into their role. And what are the duties of that role? Nothing difficult really, just ensuring that every citizen of the country is happy.
And if all these aren’t enough for you, during our research for this article, we also ran into such interesting positions as bed tester, bride kidnapping expert, freelance sperm donor or porn historian. But that’s bringing us a bit off track...